Oh, Valentine’s Day (or the more popular TimeWarnerDisneyHallmarkPringles holiday, Love Day) is here again.

Most of my past V-days have been spent drinking delicious martinis and cheaper beer (that tastes more delicious as the night goes on), and I always thought that was a pretty sound way to celebrate a day (ANY day, really!) Of course, those little chalky hearts (made with earwig meal, internet rumor has it…) were always fun to get and then puzzle over (“Does he really want me to ‘b-mine’????”) and a box of chocolate never tastes as sweet as when you get to eat it all by yourself for breakfast.

BUT… I guess people don’t always go on a date with Jack Daniels every Valentine’s Day, so here’s some stuff that you and your SO or pals or some hobo you grab off the street might like to do… (The hobo’s mine, by the way, don’t steal him.)

1.) The opera Pearl Fishers at the Ellie Caulkins Opera House
A tale of a priestess and two old friends torn apart by their love for her, the opera opens on Feb. 14. Catch a 7:30 show and get some culture in with your romancin’.

2.) Bela Karoli at the hi-dive.
Live music is an aphrodisiac; Throw in some accordion and it’s basically a recipe for an orgy, right?

3.) Anti V-Day karaoke party at the Cherry Cricket
Sounds like a good chance to gather together with other singles. Also a good chance to break out your heart-wrenching version of Meatloaf’s “Paradise by the Dash Board Light.” Nary a dry eye will be in the house when you finish with that ballad.

4.) City O’ City late-night Happy Hour
Frickin’ tried-and-true. You can share the 2-for-1 Genesse Cream Ale special with your special loved one, or maybe that drunk at the end of the bar (hey, that’s me!) Plus vegan hotwings. Come on. Tip the tall server, Neal, very well and extra love will come your way.

5.) Travel the World of Chocolate on Aurora’s Havana Street
Now that’s a tasty holiday! Get samples of sweets from around the world at this free event from 10am-4PM in our sister city.

6.) Lucha Libre match
Now this is what I plan on doing for Love Day. I’ve been trying to figure out how to procure tickets for my Gentleman Caller and myself, but sadly the only info I have is that there is a venue on Alameda that caters specifically to those wanting to take in the jaunty sights of masked luchadores. YES!!!

7.) Order vegan hotwings, get a 12 pack of PBR, and watch free shows/movies on Hulu
Add to that surf the internet and frantically post all-caps postings on bookmarked websites, and you’ve got the perfect ingredients for an awesome day.

Well, in a few short days we’ll be dismantling our LoveLand decorations, and our stuffed animals and earwig-meal candy hearts will be on their way to the landfill. Ah, the cycle is complete!